You know you're adventuring too fast when you spend over an hour at a netcafe, and you still have an entire page of notes left. In shortform:
There's a weird ecology on the shores of the polluted river through Melaka. It consists of small crabs, large crabs, axylotyls (in large numbers), and GIGANTIC MONITOR LIZARDS. The biggest one we saw was hiding in a drain - must've been well over a metre long and very fat. Yet another good reason not to go draining in Malaysia.
It's quite hard to get ripped off here even when you're trying. Standing in the dark at the gate to the Melaka Sound & Light Show, I'm under the impression that it's RM20 to get in. I only have RM50 and RM17 in change, so I give the guy the 50. He can't change it, but explains that it's only RM10 for both of us. I hand over RM10 in change and he gives us the tickets. We're working by torchlight, so it's all a little confused, but at this point I realise that I have accidentally performed a well-known confidence trick on myself, because he's still got the 50. After I make a brief but frantic search of my pockets (while casually sizing myself up against the two guys there and coming to a conclusion of Not A Chance), he locates it in his and hands it over with an apology.
I now have a tshirt containing Article 18 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. I hope that this won't get me in trouble, either in martial-law Thailand or (more likely) at Heathrow. I'll turn it inside out if asked. The wannabe-political-prisoner in me wants to print shirts containing the UDHR on the outside, and "UDHR removed by official request" on the inside.
After an adventure at (and to) Portuguese Square, I would like to award myself the titles Rider Of Local Busses, and Inefficient Eater of Crustaceans. While waiting at the bus station for a bus that would never come (they'd finished for the night), a local offered to ride off and find a taxi for us. Failing to find one, he went home, swapped his bike for his sister's car, and dropped us home. Awesome.